Boredom is the Best...Not :/

I feel like there should be something to do at all times, for those of us who have nothing better to do. Surfing the internet is fun and all, but after a while it just makes you realize how sad and alone you actually are. StumbleUpon can't talk back to, Facebook can't make any of your "friends" hang out with you. If they could, my goodness how entertaining life would be. 

So that is the series of events that has led me here tonight. All my friends are loser boys who just want to hole up and play video games all night long. Leaving me here, ranting and raving to a bunch of non-existent people over the internet. I know Christmas Eve is tomorrow and I should be relaxing and preparing for the holiday, but I am antsy. I can't sit still, and I just want to get out and go. Is that too much to ask? 

In other news, I think I have discovered a truth about life. You know how some people hurt themselves? They feel the pain and it brings them some sense of...well something. I'm pretty sure everyone is different. Anyways, I don't self-harm, but I think I have another vice to bring me pain: People. Some people will always reject you, no matter what time of year, what you have to say, anything. Nothing matters, they will always push you away. And you know what? It will always hurt. And that sucks. It never gets any better, the pain. That, however, is not what I am here to talk about. I know that a particular person will reject me. Let's call him Green. Here's a little background on Green. 

Green and I dated, like forever and a half ago. Can I run away from him like I so desperately want to? No. He is friends with my friends, and at the most random times, my friends feel the need to bring him up. "Remember the time Green and I got high and then did stupid shit?" or "Remember what Green did at so-and-so's house? Good times..." Except, OH YEAH, I don't remember, because I WASN'T THERE! And why wasn't I there, because Green is who he is, and makes this impossible. So, me being me, I try to get to the bottom of why Green wants nothing to do with me, ever. So I text him, to apologize for any wrong I might have done him at any point in my life. Does this work? No, because Green is a DB. He "accepts" the apology, then goes right back to doing stupid shit. 

I definitely knew this was the response I was going to get, because I know Green. He is stubborn as all hell, and won't budge on what he thinks. So I knew there was no way in hell I was going to get any reaction other than complete and total humiliation and disregard. Does it hurt any less when it happens though? No. So I must have been asking for it, right? I had to be. There is no way I didn't go into this knowing I would get hurt. 

So anyways, that's enough of my lunatic ranting. I shall report back tomorrow, hopefully, and with better news. 

Merry Day Before Christmas Eve, 

Jessica